Best Jokes

A young girl was very much interested in the progress of her mother’s pregnancy. Finally the day of birth drew near and the girl overheard arrangements being made for her mother to go to the hospital. She looked at her mother with great puzzlement and said,
“Mom, I don’t understand. If they’re going to deliver the baby, why do you have to go to the hospital?”

John who was not very well paid, yet who had several children learned a distressing piece of news from his wife Linda. The next morning he called his insurance agent to ask a weighty question, to which the insurance agent replied, “No, John, Linda’s pregnancy is not covered by your accident policy.”

A little girl complained that she didn’t want to go back to school.
“But why, Lisa?” asked her mother.
“Well, I can’t read, I can’t write, and they won’t let me talk.”

A high-school student came home from school seeming rather depressed.

“What’s the matter son?” asked his mother.

“Aw, gee,” said the boy, “it’s my marks. They’re all wet.”

“What do you mean, 'all wet'?” she asks.

“I mean,” he replied, “well below C-level.”