Latest Jokes

A man goes to a psychiatrist. The receptionist asks him why he is there. The man complains, "I keep seeing giraffes even if there are none."

The receptionist asks, "Have you ever seen a psychiatrist?"

The man replies, "No, just giraffes."

A couple's happy married life almost went on the rocks because of an extended visit of old Aunt Emma.
For seven long weeks she lived with them, always nagging, always demanding. Finally she decided to leave.

On the way back from driving her to the airport, the husband confessed to his wife, "Honey, if I didn't love you so much, I don't think I would have put up with having your Aunt Emma in the house all this time."

His wife looked at him aghast. "MY Aunt Emma!" she cried. "I thought she was YOUR Aunt Emma!"

The young and not so bright new pilot was learning to fly a helicopter. After two hours of great flying, she crashed.

When asked by crash investigator what happened, she said, "I got cold so I turned off the fan."

There is this boat on a jungle tour crowded with cheerful and motivated tourists. That was when they saw a frog sitting on the edge of the boat with a languid and sad look holding on to his old guitar. A tourist asks the captain what was the meaning of that?

- Look, sir. He likes attention, he is a "show frog" and plays and sings for fun. Whenever someone touches his left leg, he then raises his left leg and plays popular music. And whenever you touch his right leg, he raises his right leg and plays soft music .

- And if someone touches both his legs?

- Don't be dumb sir, if you touch both his legs, then he raises both legs, falls backwards, and sinks in the water.