Man: I'm new around here. Will you please direct me to the bank?
Little boy: I will, but only if you pay me ten dollars.
Man: Why should I pay you so much?
Little boy: Because bank directors are always highly paid.
A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. In the den was a stuffed lion.
The visiting hunter asked, ''When did you bag him?''
The host said, ''That was three years ago, when I went hunting with my wife.''
''What's he stuffed with?'' asked the visiting hunter.
“My wife!”
All day I drill holes in metal and bolt them together...
At first it's boring, but then it's riveting.
"Dad," said Little Johnny, "I'm late for football practice. Would you please do my homework for me?"
Little Johnny's father said irately, "Son, it just wouldn't be right."
"That's okay," replied Little Johnny. "You could at least give it a try, couldn't you?"