Employer: "We need someone responsible for this job."
Applicant: "Sir your search ends here! In my previous job whenever something went wrong, everybody said I was responsible."
A well respected surgeon was relaxing on his sofa one evening just after arriving home from work. As he was tuning into the evening news, the phone rang. The doctor calmly answered it and heard the familiar voice of a colleague on the other end of the line.
"We need a fourth for poker," said the friend. "I'll be right over," whispered the doctor.
As he was putting on his coat, his wife asked, "Is it serious?"
"Oh yes, quite serious," said the doctor gravely. "In fact, three doctors are there already!"
As soon as the dentist asked the patient to sit down, he pulled out his wallet. Seeing this the dentist said, "Please don't, you don't need to pay me now."
The patient answered: "Pay you! I just want to count my money before I'm unconscious!"
God made a man and then rested.
God made a woman and then no one rested.