Teacher: Well, Little Johnny, I see some improvement in your work. There are only three words that have been misspelled.

Little Johnny: Thank you.

Teacher: Now let’s look at the second sentence!

Ernie: The national sport in Spain is bull fighting and in England it’s cricket.

Bernie: I’d rather play in England.

Ernie: Why do you say that?

Bernie: It’s easier to fight crickets.

Sue: My uncle is an umpire in a restaurant.

Lou: In a restaurant?

Sue: Yes. When someone orders pancakes, he yells, “Batter up!”

Sam (boasting about his hunting trip): "All of a sudden I spotted a leopard..."

Pam: "You can’t kid me, they come that way!"