I was going to join the debate team, but somebody talked me out of it.

I used to be in a band called Missing Cat... you probably saw our posters.

A mechanic was working under a car and some brake fluid dripped into his mouth. "Wow! That stuff isn't too bad tasting," he thought. The next day, he told his buddy about tasting the brake fluid. "It was pretty good, really. I think I'll have a little more today."

His friend was a little concerned, but didn't say anything. The next day, "Hey, I drank a whole glass of brake fluid. Great stuff! I'm going to have more." A few days later, he was up to a bottle a day.

"You know," said his buddy, "that brake fluid is poison and really bad for you. You better cut out drinking that stuff."

"Hey, no problem. I can stop any time!"

At the diner, my breakfast arrived with only three sausages instead of the usual four. The waitress explained that the cook had dropped one and was making another.

Soon the cook dashed out of the kitchen. "Here you are," he announced. "It's the missing link!"