He who drinks a fifth on the fourth...
May not be able to go forth on the fifth!
Writing a horror screenplay. It starts off with a ringing phone.
The person answers and it’s their mom saying, “I have a computer question..."
My son asked me if a punch bowl is a place where you keep names of people you want to punch...
I usually keep them in my head but, keeping them in a fancy crystal bowl seems classy.
Me (texting): Are we still on for today?
Reply Received: You don’t have to text me this every morning! As your boss, trust me when I say, WE ARE "ON" FOR WORK EVERYDAY, MON - FRI!