"Bill's nowhere near the fool he was."
"Has he reformed?"
"No, he's dieting."
If you drive a Subaru in reverse, what are you?
U-R-A-BUS!
Two friends are talking over lunch in an outdoor patio.
"So what are you doing for summer vacation?" one asks.
The other one replies, " I want to go to Italy again, like last year."
The first asks, "Wow! You went to Italy last year?"
The other answers, "No, but I wanted to."
My wife says that I spend too much time talking to random people online.
What do you guys think?