kid jokes

The mother of a small child was concerned about her daughter’s selfish behavior and gave her something of a lecture, stressing that we are put in this world to help others.
Her daughter seemed much impressed and sat silently, thinking and scratching her head.
At last she looked up and said, “Mommy?”
“Yes, dear?” replied her mother.
“What I want to know is, what are the others for?”

Making conversation with the boy who enjoyed watching tv ads, the pediatrician asked six-year-old patient, "Johnny, if you found a couple of dollars and had to spend them, what would you buy?”

“A box of Tampax,” he replied without hesitation.

“Tampax?” said the doctor. “What would you do with that?”

“Well,” said Johnny, “I do not know exactly, but it’s sure worth two dollars. With tampax, it says on TV, you can go swimming, go horseback riding, and also go skating, any time you want to.”

A salesman telephone a household, and a four-year-old answered.
Salesman: May I speak to your mother?
Child: She is not here.
Salesman: Well, is anyone else there?
Child: My sister
Salesman: O.K., fine. May I speak to her?
Child: I guess so.
There was a long silence on the other phone. Then;
Child: Hello?
Salesman: It’s you. I thought you were going to call your sister.
Child: I did. The trouble is: I can’t get her out of the playpen.

A unit in sex education was about to begin, and each student had to bring in a permission slip in order to take it. A boy handed in his slip and explained to the teacher, “My mom says I can take the course as long as there’s no homework.’