kid jokes

Ten-year-old Tommy greeted his sister's boy friend very enthusiastically, "That harmonica you gave me for my birthday is easily the best present I have ever had!"

"I'm glad you liked it," the boyfriend replies.

"Oh yeah! Mother gives me a quarter a day not to play it!"

A Sunday School teacher wanted to use squirrels as an example of a diligent work ethic and being prepared. She started the lesson by saying, "I'm going to describe something, and I want you to raise your hand when you know what it is." The children were excited to show her what they knew and leaned forward eagerly.

"I'm thinking of something that lives in trees and eats nuts." No hands went up. "It can be gray or brown and it has a long bushy tail." The children looked around the room at each other, but still no one raised a hand.

"It chatters and sometimes it flips its tail when it's excited?"

Finally one little boy shyly raised his hand. The teacher breathed a sigh of relief and said, "Okay, Michael. What do you think it is?"

"Well," said the boy, "I know the answer's supposed to be Jesus, but it sure sounds like a squirrel to me.