puns jokes

Congratulations to me!

I just made my last mortgage payment...

I still owe like $262,000, I'm just not going to pay them any more.

If you spell the words “Absolutely Nothing” backwards, you get Gnihton Yletulosba…

Which ironically means... absolutely nothing.

Murphy told Quinn that his wife is driving him to drink.

Quinn thinks he’s very lucky because his own wife makes him walk.

Dolphin baby: How did you and Mom meet?

Dolphin Dad: We met in school.

Dolphin Mom: Don’t…

Dolphin Dad: And we just clicked