Best Jokes

"Doctor, I want to thank you for your great medicine."

"It helped you, did it?" asked the doctor very much pleased.

"It helped me wonderfully."

"How many bottles did you find it necessary to take?"

"Oh, I didn't take any of it. My uncle took one bottle, and I am his sole heir."

"Did you hear the story about the peacock?"

"No."

"It's a beautiful tale."

What is a solar panel's favorite drink?

What else, a Sunny D!

"I hate to have to tell you this," said Dr. Mike Wilson in a sad compassionate voice, "but you have unfortunately been diagnosed with a highly contagious disease. We will have to quarantine you and you'll only be fed cheese and bologna."

"That's terrible!" said the distraught young man, quickly sitting down before he could faint. "I don't know if I could handle being in quarantine... and the cheese and bologna diet... What's with the cheese and bologna diet anyway? I've never of such a diet before?!"

"It's not exactly a diet," responded Doctor Wilson, "it's just the only food that will fit under the door."