Best Jokes

Why did the turtle cross the road? “To get to the shell station.”


Why was the turtle so shiny when he left the shell station?
He used some turtle wax!

Q: Why did Mr. Stupid tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
A: He didn't want to wake up the sleeping pills!!

Q: What did King Tut say when he was scared?
A: I want my mummy!!!

Two men, both married, were discussing their lives. Suddenly one says," You know, I think I would like to die before my wife"
" Now why is that"? Asked the other.
" Because if she's there when I arrive, she'll be telling a lot of things about me. And I want to clear my account before that"!