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Favorite this joke Three Spies are captured in London. One is German, one is French and the other is Italian.
First they interrogate the German spy and after 3 hours of torture he talks and is thrown back into the cell with the others.
Then the French spy is interrogated, and after about 8 hours of torture they get him to talk and throw him back with the others.
Last they interrogate the Italian spy and after 20 hours of torture and failing to make him say a word they give up for the day and throw him back with the others. When he is back in the cell with the other spies asked him,
"how did you last that long without saying a word"? Then the Italian man says, "I was trying to speak but they had my hands strapped down and I wasn't able to move them".
Blind people can drive...
Just mostly into things.
Why shouldn't you date a tennis player?
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Because love means nothing to them.
A farmer has three sons. One day, his oldest boy comes to him and pleads with him that he is graduating from school and would really like to get a car. His father says, "Son, come with me." He takes him to the barn and points to the farm tractor and says, "That tractor is
needed here on the farm and I promise that as soon as it's paid for, we'll get you a car."
The boy was not too happy but he did understand that
situation and said, "Okay, Dad."
A week later, his second son (10 years old) approaches him wanting a new two-wheel bicycle. Well, he gets the same excuse ... "as soon as that tractor is paid for..."
Shortly, a few days later, son no. 3, his youngest, comes
bugging him for a tricycle. Again, 'ol Dad gives him the lecture about the tractor being paid for first.
While leaving the barn, the young boy, more than a little
disgusted with the whole thing, sees a rooster mating with one of the hens and promptly goes over and kicks the rooster off the hens back, mumbling to himself the whole time.
His dad says, "Son, why on earth would you do something like that? He didn't do anything to you to
deserve that!"
The little boy looks Dad right square in the eye and says,
"Hey, nobody rides anything around here until that damn tractor is paid for.
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