Latest Jokes

Yes, Theo, what is it? Asked the teacher.
I don’t wan to alarm you, Miss Davis, but my dad said if I didn’t get better marks, someone was going to get a licking.

The teacher said; Tommy, this is the fifth day this week you’ve had to stay after school. What have you to say for yourself?
I’m certainly glad it’s Friday, said Tommy.

The census taker knocked on Miss Gibson’s door. She answered all his questions except one. She refused to tell him her age. “But everybody tells their age to the census taker,” the man said. “Did Miss Mary Hill and Miss Patty Hill tell you their ages?”
“Certainly.” Well, I’m the same age as they are,” she snapped. “As old as the Hills,” the man wrote on his form.

The trumpet player had been blasting away all day, when there was a knock on his door. “I live next door to you,” he explained. “Do you know I work nights?” “No,” said the trumpet player, “but if you hum a few bars, I’ll get the melody.”