A woman gets an opportunity to fly to a nearby country. She has never been on an airplane anywhere and was very excited and tense. As soon as she boarded the plane, a Boeing747, she started jumping in excitement, running over seat to seat and starts shouting, "BOEING! BOEING!! BOEING!!! BO....."
She sort of forgets where she is, even the pilot in the cock-pit hears the noise. Annoyed by the goings on, the Pilot comes out and shouts "Be silent!"
There was pin-drop silence everywhere and everybody is looking at the woman and the angry Pilot. She stared at the pilot in silence for a moment, concentrated really hard, and all of a sudden started shouting, "OEING! OEING! OEING! OE...."
How do you know when you've really reached a mathematician's voice mail?
"The subscript you have dialed is syntaxed error at the moment, please rotate your calculator to 90 degrees and redial again."
An accountant got out of bed one morning and complained that he had not slept a wink.
“Why didn’t you count sheep?” his wife asked.
“I did, and that’s what got me into trouble,” the accountant replied. “I made a mistake the first hour, and it took until this morning to correct it.”
A cowboy was leading a flock of sheep down Main Street when he was ordered to stop by the town policeman.
“What’s wrong?” the cowboy asked. “I was just heading my ewes into a side street.”
“That’s the trouble,” the policeman replied. “No ewe turns permitted on Main Street!”