You have $400 and your daughter calls and needs $250. Later on you son calls and needs $100.
What do you have left?
$400 and 2 missed calls!
A student at a management school came up to a pretty girl and hugged her without any warning.
The surprised girl said, “What was that?”
The guy smiled at her, “Direct marketing!”
The girl slapped him soundly.
“What was that?!” said the boy, holding his cheek.
“Customer feedback.”
I spent $80 on a belt that didn't fit...
My wife said it was a huge waist.
Didya hear the one about the new show planned for TV's Food Network sponsored by the Arthur Andersen accounting firm?
It's called "Cook the Books"!