Did you hear about the dog that ate nothing but garlic?
His bark was much worse than his bite.
A man went to the doctor and said: “Doctor, I keep having visions of the future.”
“When did these start?”
“Next Thursday.”
Why did the doctor carry out blood tests on the secretarial candidates?
So that he could eliminate type-O's.
One morning my wife asked our four-year-old son, Jud, what he wanted for breakfast.
”Soup,” he said.
“Son, we don’t eat soup for breakfast. We eat soup for lunch. So what would you like for breakfast?”
“Lunch,” he replied.