Favorite this joke One Sunday morning, a wife complained of a bad stomach ache and wouldn't be able to attend the church service, so her husband went alone. When he returned later, he had two black eyes!
When she asked what happened, he explained that when everyone rose to sing a hymn, he noticed the lady in the pew in front of him had her dress tucked into her rear end. Well, being ever the gentleman, he figured she wouldn't want to be seen that way, so he reached forward and pulled it out for her. She turned around and slugged him in the eye!
"But," his wife said, "how did the OTHER eye get black too?"
He explained, "When she turned back around, I was still a bit stunned, but I thought to myself she must have wanted it there. So I reached forward and gently tucked it back in."
After waiting more than an hour and a half for her date, Sarah decided she had been stood up.
Exasperated, she changed from her dinner dress into pajamas and slippers, fixed some popcorn and hot chocolate, and resigned herself to an evening of TV.
No sooner had she flopped down in front of the TV when the doorbell rang. Her dad went to the door, and there stood her date.
He took one look at Sarah on the couch and gasped, "I'm two hours late and she's still not ready?"
Have you ever wondered...
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Grandson: "When did you first realize you were getting old, grandpa?"
Grandpa: "When I started having my midnight snack at 9:30 pm."
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