A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears and asks him how he is feeling.
"I'm O. K. but I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used in surgery," he answered.
"What did he say," asked the nurse.
"Oops!"

Nurse: Good morning Mr. Smith, you seem to be coughing much more easily this morning.

Mr. Smith: I should be, I’ve been practicing all night.

“Doctor, I keep thinking I’m a goat.”

“How long have you had this feeling?”

“Ever since I was a kid.”

Doctor: I’m sorry to have to tell you that you may have rabies, and it could prove fatal.
Patient: Well, doctor, please give me pencil and paper.
Doctor: To make your will?
Patient: No, to make a list of people I want to bite.