What do you say to a hitchhiker with one leg?
Hop in

The best part about computers is that they make very fast, specific mistakes.

A software expert was being attacked over his new product. He was defensive and would not back down.

"Your software has bugs!"

The expert replied, “My software never has bugs... it just develops some random features, that's all.”

Waiter: And how did you find your steak, sir?
Customer: Well, I just pushed aside a bean and there it was!