What do you call a person wearing ear plugs?
Anything you want. They can't hear you.
"I have really good eyesight. Even in the dark, I can see things that are far away."
"Really, like what things?"
"Well, the moon and the stars."
Why do clowns hold books they read very close to their faces?
So their noses are well red!
Two old guys, Fred and Sam went to the movies. A few minutes after it started, Fred heard Sam rustling around and he seemed to be searching on the floor under his seat.
“What are you doing?” asked Fred.
Sam, a little grumpy by this time, replied “I had a caramel in my mouth and it dropped out. I can’t find it.”
Fred told him to forget it because it would be too dirty by now. “But I’ve got to,” said Sam, “my teeth are in it!”