Past Winners

Recently I went to a new golf shop in the big city. I shopped and studied and finally selected the new clubs I wanted. As I was checking out and getting ready to pay, the cashier said, "Strip down, facing me".

Not sure what was going on and not being used to the big city ways, I did as she asked. When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I found out she was referring to how I should place my credit card in the card reader.

I've been asked to shop elsewhere in the future. They need to make their instructions to seniors a little clearer. I still don't think I looked that bad.

(Grandpa) "Honey did you know that kids these days don't put their tooth under the pillow for the tooth fairy? What they do is take a digital image and upload it to the toothfairy website they then get paid in bit coins."

(Grandma) "Dear, you've been talking to your grandson again and he's pulling your leg."

(Grandpa) "Billy, why would you make up a story about the tooth fairy?"

(Grandson) "Let me get this straight... you make up a story about a fictitious character, you then tell it to my parents who perpetuate the hoax. I decided to elaborate on it and you're calling me out!"

When I went back to the medical lab to have some blood drawn, I was greeted with a battery of questions from the technician.

“Has your address changed?” she asked.

“No,” I answered.

“Your phone number?”

“No.”

“What about your birthday?”

A man in a movie theater notices what looks like a baby giraffe sitting next to him. "Are you a baby giraffe?" asked the man, surprised.

"Yes."

"What are you doing at the movies?"

The giraffe replied, "Well, I liked the book."