misc jokes

A philanthropist is a man who gives away what he should be giving back.

Talk is cheap….. if lawyers don’t do the talking.

The man applied for a job with a chain food store. “What is your experience with groceries?” asked the interviewer. “Well,” said the applicant. “I’m eating them all the time.”

An urgent call was put in for a plumber at noon but he didn’t arrive until 5 hours later. “How is it?” he asked entering the house. “Not so bad,” replied the home owner. “While we were waiting for you to arrive I taught my wife how to swim.”