misc jokes

Little Freddy's second-grade teacher was quizzing them on the Antartian alphabet.
"Freddy," she says, "what comes after 'O'?"
Freddy says, "Yeah!"

How does the IRS describe a day at work?
Taxing.

The politician was sitting at his campaign headquarters when the phone rang. He listened intently, and after a moment his face brightened. When he hung up, he immediately phoned his mother to tell her the good news.
"Ma!!!," he shouted, "the results are in. I won the election!!!"
"Honestly?", his mother replied.
The politician's smiled faded. "Aw hell, ma, why bring that up at a time like this?"

Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided?
The survivors were marooned.