word play jokes

Hidden Definitions...

HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.
INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MYTH: A female moth.
MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.
TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor-saving devices of today.
YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.
WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.

A certain man was infatuated with a young woman, but he was so timid that he never had the courage to speak to her.

In fact, he told his therapist that every time he got near her, he felt like nothing more than a tiny pebble.

"Well," his therapist responded, "if you want to get the girl, you'll just have to be a little boulder!"

I went to the home improvement store to buy some paint. I saw the Behr brand. It had a picture of a bear on the label. I’m not sure what “B-e-h-r" is supposed to spell but it isn’t bear.

I wasn’t going to buy a brand that doesn’t know there’s a difference in spellings.

I went with Sherwin Williams because it was clear with their brand name it would be a sher-win for me!

What is the worlds biggest sphere?

The At-most-sphere!