Best Jokes

Q: What do u call a midget psychic on the run from the law?

A: A small medium at large.

Question: Who takes care of the farm when the farmer is sick?

Answer: The pharmacist.

The lawyer was cross-examining a witness. “Isn’t it true,“ he began, “that you were given $5000.00 to throw this case?”

The witness did not answer. Instead, he just stared out the window as though he hadn’t heard the question. The attorney repeated himself, again getting the same reaction, the same no response. Finally, the judge spoke to the witness, “Please answer the question.”

“Oh,” said the startled witness, “I'm sorry your honor. I thought he was talking to you.”

John, an avant-garde painter got married.

Someone asked the bride a few weeks after the wedding, "How's married life, Helen?"

"It's great," she answered. "John paints and I cook; then we try to guess what he painted and what I cooked."