Best Jokes

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Duane

Duane who?

Duane the bathtub, I'm drowning!

A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman, "Which book has helped you most in your life?"

The woman replied, "That would be my husband's check book."

I had an uncle who was allergic to cotton...

He got some pills for the condition but couldn't get them out of the bottle.

Back when I went to college, the female dormitory was out-of-bounds for all male students, as was the male dormitory to the female students.It was explained to us during orientation that anybody caught breaking this rule would be fined $20 the first time.

Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time would be fined $60. Being caught a third time incurred a hefty fine of $180. Then we were asked, “Are there any questions?"

At this, a male student in the crowd inquired. "Er... How much for a season pass?"