Best Jokes

“My great-grandma gave me this money,” said my three-year-old, happily clutching a $20 bill he’d gotten as a present.

“That’s right,” I said. “How did you know that?”

Pointing to Andrew Jackson’s face in the middle, he said, “Because her picture is on it.”

Just seen a burglar kicking his own door in.

I asked: “What are you doing?”

He said: “Working from home.”

A man was standing in a line at a bank to withdraw cash. After an hour his turn came and he gave his bank details to the cashier. The cashier said, "I am sorry, sir. There's no cash."

Fuming with anger, the man rushed to the manager's room and yelled at him. "You are a big bank and you don't have cash? Close my account!" he demanded.

The manager pacified the man and rushed to the cashier. Minutes later he returned and the man asked, "Did you bring my cash or you are still running out of it?"

The manager replied, "Sir, we have enough cash. Unfortunately, your account does not."

A man went to New York on a business trip. When the trip was over, he took a cab to get to the airport. The cab driver decided to have a little fun at the man's expense, so he asked, "My mother had three kids, one was my brother, one was my sister, who was the third?"

The passenger had no idea. The driver replied, "The third one was ME!"

The man went home to his wife and said to her, "Hey honey, here's a riddle for you. My mother had three kids, one was my brother, one was my sister, who was the third one?"

His wife was stumped and said, "I don't know, who?"

The man responded, "Believe it or not, some cab driver in New York."