Customer: "Excuse me waiter, this coffee tastes like mud."
Waiter: "Yes sir, it's fresh ground."
Mark was passing by the bar on the way home from work when he sees his good friend Tom gulping down one shot after another.
Fearing the worst, Mark charged into the bar and confronted Tom. “Tom what’s going on?” Mark asked.
“It’s my wife Beckie,” Tom replied. “She ran off with my best friend!”
“Hey wait a second!" said Mark. “Aren’t I your best friend?”
“Not any more,” Tom said with a happy smile. “He is!”
Do you know what would happen if Satan lost all of his hair?
There would be HELL TOUPEE!
My goal for 2019 is to accomplish the goals set in 2018, which I should have done in 2017, because I promised to in 2016 and planned to do in 2015.