Latest Jokes

Seven-year-old John had finished his summer vacation and gone back to school. Two days later his teacher phone his mother to tell her that John was misbehaving.

"Wait a minute," said the mother. "I had John here for two months and I never called you once when he misbehaved."

Q. What's te definition of a bachelor pad?
A. All the house plants are dead, but there's something growing in the refrigerator.

A college professor walked into a bas and said, “Bring me a martinus.”
The bartender smiled and said, “You mean martini?”
“If I want more than one,” snapped the professor, “I’ll order them”

A woman sat down on a park bench, glanced around and decided to stretch out her legs on the seat and relax. After a while, a beggar came up to her and said, "Hello, luv, how's about us going for a walk together?"
"How dare you," retorted the woman, "I'm not one of your cheap pickups!"
Well then," said the tramp, "what are you doing in my bed?"