A group of extraterrestrials were sent to earth to monitor and/or stop the use of nuclear weapons. The first creature they made contact with was a chimpanzee. Mistakenly they mistook the chimp as being the dominant species of planet earth.
After scanning the chimp one of them looked at the others and said, “This must be a mistake, perhaps we’re on the wrong planet.”
One of the other Aliens said, “You may be right. It’s obvious these beings are far too intelligent to use nuclear power in a destructive way."
An older woman asked her techie grandson, "What's the deal with this Craigslist thing?"
"It's a website where you can buy and sell all kinds of things and more," he replied.
"Can you get rid of stuff there?" she asked.
"Yes, you can set a price or give things away that you don't want around the house anymore."
"I like the give away free idea. How do I get started?" the woman asked.
"Well, it's always good to have a picture," the grandson said.
"OK. Will this old wedding photo do?"
Apparently to start a zoo you need at least two pandas, a grizzly, and three polars...
It's the bear minimum.
My boss calls me "the computer"...
Nothing to do with intelligence, I go to sleep if left unattended for 15 minutes.