Past Winners

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

Love is like peeing yourself – everyone can see but only you feel the warmth.

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says - "What the hell was that all about?"

Two men were walking down the street when they saw a dog licking himself.
One man said "I wish I could do that."
The other man said "you should probably just pet him first."