Two dogs wearing their finest collars entered a bar.
After ordering they noticed that all the other dogs in the bar were not wearing collars.
That's when they realized they were in a STRAY BAR.
A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor's office. "Is it true," she wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?"
"Yes, I'm afraid so," the doctor told her.
There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied, "I'm wondering then, just how serious is my condition because this prescription is marked 'NO REFILLS'?"
Money doesn't buy happiness?
Well, it does buy a jet ski.
Have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski?
A British guy stabbed the 12th letter of the alphabet several times.
Bloody L.