Best Jokes

2 votes

One year, Santa procrastinated too much and had an hour to go over his naughty nice list.

He was in a cabin gaining some progress when he heard a knock on his door. "Santa, we need your help in the workshop!"

Frustrated, Santa yelled "I'm busy right now, handle it yourselves. I can't afford to be interrupted!" And slammed the door.

Not 15 minutes later another knock is heard and his agitation is climbing. He opens the door and yells "What?!"

It was Mrs. Claus and she said startled "I brought you some food."

His face tuning red, he says "I've got a half hour left to check this list, I can't be interrupted!" He then slammed the door on his wife. He then says "I swear, the next interruption I get I'll just lose it."

About 20 minutes passed when he heard a knock at the door. He stormed to the door with a burning hatred when he opened it. It was an angel holding a Christmas tree. "Hey Santa, where do you want the tree?"

2 votes

CATEGORY Holiday Jokes
posted by "Don Dante" |
2 votes

Selling at an auction was halted when the auctioneer announced, “Someone in the room has lost his wallet containing $2,000. He is offering a reward of $500.00 for its immediate return.”

After a moment of silence, there was a call from the back of the room, “$550.00!”

2 votes

CATEGORY Business Jokes
posted by "Anonymous" |
$10.00 won 1 votes

What does one wildebeest say to another wildebeest say at the beginning of each year?

“Happy Gnu Year!”

1 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "Dan the Man 009" |
$6.00 won 1 votes

I walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a Screwdriver.

He disappears and reappears twenty minutes later with a Philips Head screwdriver.

I look at him aghast and say, “What would you have done if I asked for a Bloody Mary?”

1 votes

posted by "Dan the Man 009" |