Best Jokes

A teenage foreign exchange student knew the metric system as well as European colloquialism and slang but he wasn’t well versed with imperial measurement or the use of North American English.

When the exchange student wanted to know what a foot is, the boy that helped him only added to his confusion by saying. “I can give you a hand with that.”

I always feel nervous when I walk through a cornfield...

I keep thinking I'm being stalked.

My father said I missed parts of the lawn when I cut it.

He told me people are respected when they do stand-up work.

My father has always been a wise man so I followed his wishes and became a comedian.

The reason they named a bar a bar and not a fly is because wedding invitations work much better when it’s announced they’re having an open bar.