Best Jokes

A farmhand went to church one Sunday, but when he entered he saw that he and the preacher were the only ones present. The preacher asked the farmhand if he wanted to go ahead and preach.

”Well,” said the farmhand, “I’m not too smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I’d still feed him.”

So the minister began his sermon. An hour passed, then two hours, then two and a half hours. Finally the preacher finished and asked the farmhand whether he had enjoyed the sermon.

“Well,” said the farmhand, “I’m not too smart, but if I went to feed my cattle and only one showed up, I sure wouldn’t feed him all the hay.”

I went to the doctor the other day. She told me that I needed to get some exercise. So I went to McDonald's.

My wife wanted to know why I went there. I told her the doctor told me to get some extra fries.

She made me an appointment with a hearing doctor.

A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: "Keep off the Grass!"

Q: What did the janitor yell when he jumped out of the closet?

A: "Supplies!"