Best Jokes

Someone gave me a book about Procrastination. I'll read it sometime later.

I checked out a book from the library called "How to Have a Perfect Memory." Now if I just could remember where I put it.

I wonder, do birds always plan things, or do they sometimes just wing it?

Wife: Dear God, I wish you could make my husband pay more attention to me, protect me, take me out, sleep close to me at night. I wish he would be more caring, even if I got the smallest of scratches.

God turned her into a smartphone.