Latest Jokes

One day God was looking down at Earth and saw all the rascally behavior that was going on. He decided to send an angel down to Earth to check things out.

When the angel returned, he told God, "Yes, it is bad on Earth; 95% are misbehaving and only 5% are not." God thought for a moment and said, "Maybe I had better send down another angel for a second opinion."

When that angel returned, he went to God and said, "Yes, it's absolutely true. The Earth is in a ravaging decline! 95% are misbehaving and only 5% are being good."

God was not pleased. So He decided to send an email to the 5% that were good, because he wanted to encourage them. Give them a little something to help them keep going.

Do you know what the E-mail said?

Just wondering.......I didn't get one either!

Our local ice cream store likes to be creative with new names for flavors, but i think they have gone to far with their latest... Chocolate Chip Chipotle.

I can always tell when my wife goes on a diet...

I find Hostess Twinkies in her underwear drawer.

My three hundred plus pound of a grandfather loves to do karaoke. One night he was really into some heavy metal rock and roll song, even doing an air guitar routine.

Well, after he was done a young fellow came up to him and said, "You are a hip old dude!"

My grandfather snapped back, "Who you callin' a hippo - dude?!?!"