Latest Jokes

Cop: So, I’m writing you a ticket for driving alone in the carpool lane.

Criminal: You’re going to feel really stupid when you look in my trunk!

These two guys out hunting find a hole in the woods that's about three feet across, but it's so deep that when they drop a rock, they hear no sound. So they drop a bigger rock, but they still hear nothing.

So they go looking for something larger, and they find a railroad tie, haul it over to the hole, and heave it in. It also disappears without a sound.

Suddenly a goat comes running up at about sixty miles an hour and dives headfirst into the hole. And there's still no sound. Nothing.

Suddenly a farmer appears from the woods and says, "HEY! You fellas seen my goat around here?"

And they say, "Well, there was a goat just ran by here real fast and dove into this hole here."

"Naw," says the farmer, "that couldn't be my goat. My goat was tied up to a railroad tie."

A coworker named Celsius recently retired at my work, so they hired a guy named Kelvin to replace him.

He’s the new temp!