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Favorite this joke After shopping at a busy store, another woman and I happened to leave at the same time, only to be faced with the daunting task of finding our cars in the crowded parking lot. Just then my car horn beeped, and I was able to locate my vehicle easily.
“Wow,” the woman said. “I sure could use a gadget like that to help me find my car.”
“Actually,” I replied, “that’s my husband.”
Two drunks were babbling about when they were born as they leaned heavily against the bar.
"You know," said one, "when I was born I weighed a pound and a half, and that's a fact."
"You don't say," said the other. "And did you live?"
"Did I live?" exclaimed the first. "Heck man, you ought to see me now."
A man is stunned when his hot, newly divorced neighbor knocks at his door. He answers eagerly and she asks him, "Are you free tonight?"
He blurts out, "Yes!"
She asks, "Great! Would you watch my kids?"
Two little girls were playing together one afternoon in the park when one said, "I wonder what time it is?"
"Well, it can't be four o'clock," replied the other with magnificent logic.
"How do you know," asked the first girl.
"Because my mother said I was to be home by four o'clock and I'm not."
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