Latest Jokes

The church council met to discuss the pastor’s compensation package for the coming year. After the meeting the chair of council told the pastor, “We are very sorry, Pastor, but we are unable to give you a raise for next year.”

“But a raise would be helpful,” said the pastor. “I am but a poor preacher.”

“l know,” the council chair said. “We hear you every Sunday.”

Hidden Definitions...

HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.
INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
MYTH: A female moth.
MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.
TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor-saving devices of today.
YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.
WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.

Why are harps like elderly parents?

They’re both unforgiving and difficult to get in and out of cars.

The conductor turned to the viola student and said, “You should have taken up the viola earlier."

“Why?” asked the student. “Do you think the practice would have made me really good?”

“No,” said the conductor. “But you might have given up by now.”