A man had just bought a parrot at an auction after some very spirited bidding.

"I suppose that bird talks?" he said to the auctioneer.

"Talks!" was the reply. "Who do you think was bidding against you?"

Dentist: Little Johnny, you're not brushing your teeth very well. Do you know what comes after decay?

Little Johnny: De 'L'?

How do you turn an elephant into an insect?

Take away the "eleph."

Two dogs talking...

Fido: I can't go to dog obedience school tonight.

Spot: Why not?

Fido: My master ate my homework.