A farmer asked the vet to come out to check on his favorite bull who wasn't doing well at all. After checking the bull's vital signs, the vet reached in his black bag and pulled out a rather large pill.
He forced open the bull's mouth and crammed the pill down his gullet. Suddenly the bull jumped up and took off like a banshee, jumping every fence in his way.
The vet exclaimed, "Well, looks like your bull is healed!"
The farmer replied, "Now give me one of those pills. I've gotta catch him!"
Did you know that Adam and Eve were the first couple to not read and understand the fine print on their Apple contract?
So I was having lunch with Bobby Fischer, the former world chess champion, and the table had a checkered tablecloth.
It took him two hours to pass the salt!
I was stunned last night when my wife told me I was too wrapped up in myself....
When did I get a wife?