Past Winners

What do you see when the smog lifts in Los Angeles?

U.C.L.A...

A father and his six-year-old son were watching a football game on TV.

After a particular bad play the father exploded, “Just look at that stupid halfback! He’s fumbled three times and every time the other team has recovered the football. Why do they let an idiot like that play in the game?”

The little boy thought for a moment and offered an explanation. “Daddy,” he said, “maybe it’s his ball.”

"Danny," began Mrs. Waters, "what's usually used as a conductor of electricity?"

"Why- er..."

"Correct, wire. Now tell me, what is the unit of electrical power?"

"The what???"

That's absolutely right. The watt."

While prosecuting a robbery case, I conducted an interview with the arresting officer. My first question was, “Did you see the defendant at the scene?”

“Yes, from a block away,” the officer answered.

“Was the area well lit?”

“No. It was pretty dark.”

“Then how could you identify the defendant?” I asked, concerned.

Looking at me as if I were nuts, he answered, “I’d recognize my cousin anywhere.”