Past Winners

When a rattlesnake got loose in the second-floor hall of the science building at my university, it created quite a furor. Fortunately, one of the professors was an expert on snakes.

An agitated student ran to fetch him, urging him to come quickly, as a dangerous snake was loose and terrorizing everyone in the building.

The professor leisurely strolled out into the hall, examined the snake from head to tail, and calmly returned to his office. “It’s not one of mine,” he said, and closed the door.

As my sister relaxed on the couch, her head comfortably leaning against the crook of her husband’s arm, her cell phone beeped.

She looked at her phone. It was a text message from her husband.

The message: "Please Move."

Did you know that "dammit i'm mad" spelled backwards is "dammit I'm mad"?

I was choking on carrots and all I could think of was, "I bet a donut wouldn't have done this to me!"