misc jokes
Favorite this joke Bobby: What is the difference between a lemon, an elephant, and a bag of cement?
Ray: I give up, what's the difference?
Bobby: You can squeeze a lemon, but you can't squeeze an elephant.
Ray: What about the bag of cement?
Bobby: I just threw that in to make it hard.
Because an increasing number of people are having heart attacks while gambling, the big, high-class casinos are now equipped with sophisticated defibrillators.
They are computer-controlled to deliver the exact electric shock needed to revive a heart attack victim.
At the cheaper casinos, they just drag you across the carpet and touch your finger to the doorknob.
I went skydiving today for the first time.
This guy strapped himself to me, we jumped out of the plane.
As we plummeted he said, "So how long have you been an instructor?"
I sat in my hair stylist's chair and said, “Make me look sexy!”
She then got drunk.
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