religious jokes

Just then, another huge wave appears out of nowhere and crashes on the beach.

As the water recedes, the boy is standing there, smiling, splashing around as if nothing had happened.

A loud voice booms from the sky, "I have returned your grandson. Are you satisfied?"

Sarah responds, "Well... He WAS wearing a hat."

Proverbs as finished by a fourth grade class:

There is nothing new... under a rock.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with... a private jet.

If you can't stand the heat... try Antarctica.

Better late than... absent.

Laugh, and the world laughs with you. Cry, and... then blow your nose.

A bird in the hand is... better than a woodpecker on your head.

Early to bed, early to rise... and you will get the best cereal.

Don't burn your bridges... or you'll fall in the lake.

Haste makes... sweat.

A penny saved... is not a lot.

A miss is as good as... a mister.

An old-time pastor was riding furiously down the road, hurrying to get to church on time. Suddenly, his horse stumbled and threw him to the ground.

Lying in the dirt, his body wracked with pain, the pastor called out, “All you angels in heaven, help me get up on my horse!”

With extraordinary strength, he leaped onto the horse’s back—and fell off the other side. From the ground again, he called out, “All right, just half of you angels this time!”

A nearsighted minister glanced at the note that Mrs. Jones had sent to him by an usher. The note read: "Bill Jones having gone to sea, his wife desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety."

Failing to observe the punctuation, he startled his audience by announcing: "Bill Jones, having gone to see his wife, desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety."