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Favorite this joke I wrote a book about birds...
It flew off the shelf.
Sammy wants to test the math skills of his 5 year old cousin, Perry. He asks him, "If you have two candies and I give you two candies, how many candies will you have?"
Without hesitating, Perry answers. "Before I answer that, first give me the two candies."
Feeling alone? Feeling unwanted, like no one gives a hoot?
Do what I did... don't file your tax returns.
“That’s a nice plant,” said a woman at the florist’s shop, pointing to the flower I was buying.
“Yeah, my wife and I had an argument,” I admitted. “I was going to buy her a dozen roses, but I don’t think she’s that mad at me.”
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