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Favorite this joke An alcoholic wakes up in jail. He asks the first police officer he sees, "Why am I here?"
"For drinking," replies the officer.
"Great," says the man, "when do we start?"
There are bats hanging off a branch upside down, all except one.
Two bats comment, "What's happened to this one?"
"I don't know, two minutes ago he seemed normal and then he fainted."
We put our dog on a vegan diet, and she's doing really well...
She's eaten two so far.
A customer in a New York restaurant gushed to the chef, "Your veal parmigiana is superb! I spent a month in Italy, and yours is better than any I had over there."
"Naturally," the chef said. "Over there, they use domestic cheese. Ours is imported!"
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